The University of East London Students' Union -
"So what's that then?"
Well...
The University of East London Students Union (sometimes just called 'The Students' Union' or UELSU) is an autonomous body that's formed to help you (the student body, who are our membership) to get the most out of your degree and university life here at the University of East London. Once you have enrolled for a course here at UEL, you automatically become a member of the UEL students' union . You do have the option to decline from being a member, you will have to go to one of our receptions either at Univeristy House/Passmore Edwards Building at the Stratford Campus or to the North Building/Student Centre at the Docklands Campus. To add to that UELSU is affilated to the National Union of Students which means that everyone who is a member of UEL is also automatically a member of the National Union of Students.
These two affiliations shouldn't be confused with the additional bonuses of the NUS Extra Card (see ' NUS' in the 'Register' section) or with membership to individual teams, sports clubs, hobbies and cultural societies (see 'Activities' in the 'What's Happening' section) of which there is a payment involved for the use of these services.
The Students Union is here to support you in matters surrounding university life, from difficulties with you academic, financial aspects of studying (see the 'Advice & Information' section), representation (see the 'Politics' section) and the social aspect of studying here (see the 'What's Happening' section). The union is directed and facilitated by it's members to ensure that it members (the students) get the best out of university life.
The Students Union has many venues, Docklands Underground Bar (located on Docklands Campus next to Cyprus DLR Station), The Students Union Shop (Docklands Campus, East Building) which comprises of snacks, groceries and technical equipment, Passmore Edwards Venue (located in Stratford Campus in the Passmore Edwards Building next to University House) which offers games, snacks and drinks, UELSU Common Room (located on the west side of the dock opposite the car park and halls of residence) where snacks, drink and games will also be available from September 2008. Also in the pipeline is the opening of our Aqua East Bar which has two floors which will offer food as well as alcoholic beverages which is located next to the common room and the halls on the east side of campus.
If there are any more questions then please feel free to come into any SU reception, contact a member staff or ask one of your elected executive. Feel free to browse the website for more information. Remember to join the UELSU Social Network (a bit like Facebook or Myspace) where you can join activities meet people and talk to each other. To sign up CLICK HERE.
Don't forget, your union is made by your decisions, so get involved.
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Latest Local News
Death Row in Women's Prison
Three women are about to be executed. One''s a brunette, one''s a redhead, and one''s a blonde. The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!"
Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.
The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!"
Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.
By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
And the blonde yells, "FIRE!!!"
The Most Gruesome Death
There was a long, long line of spirits at the gate waiting to get into heaven. Not all these spirits could fit into heaven, so the ones who died the worst death would be allowed in.
The first man in line started telling his story, "Well, Peter, you see, I knew that my wife was cheating on me so I decided to come home early from work one day to catch them in action. I got home and searched all over but I couldn't find him. Then when I walked out onto the balcony, there he was dangling off the darn thing by his fingertips. So I ran and got a hammer then started beating him with it and he fell. Well, the fall didn't kill him, because he landed in a bush so I picked up the refrigerator and threw it on him. Although that killed him, the strain gave me a heart attack, and here I am."
The next man came up and started his story. "St. Peter, I always work out on my balcony on the 14th floor of my apartment building. I was on my bike one day and I fell off when it flipped. I sailed over the rail and I thought "Please God spare my life" and he did. I caught on to a balcony below me. I was even happier when a man discovered me hanging there. But all of a sudden he started beating my hands with a hammer so I fell again. But the dear Lord saved me again when I landed in a bush. But I'm here now because the guy threw his refrigerator on top of me."
It was now the third guy's turn to start his story. "Well, Peter, just picture this. I'm hiding butt naked in this married chick's refrigerator....."
Sensitive Beer
Three hicks were working on a telephone tower - Steve, Bruce and Jed. Steve falls off and is killed instantly.
As the ambulance takes the body away, Bruce says, "Someone should go and tell his wife."
Jed says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."
Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of beer.
Bruce says, "Where did you get that, Jed?"
"Steve's wife gave it to me," Jed replies.
"That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?"
Well, not exactly", Jed says. "When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Steve's widow'."
She said, "No, I'm not a widow!"
And I said, "I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.
